Wednesday, February 23, 2005


Wobblebottoms Reloaded

In an earlier post, I noted the large number of - er - large people you see in the US.

If a five foot tall person is happy being their ideal weight - if they were nine feet tall - I personally have no problem with it. But if they feel like taking a trip to the UK, they should exercise caution, as the authorities there take a tough line on gutbuckets.

Consider the case of Chris Leppard. He weighs what is by Chicago standards a quite modest 462 pounds. When members of his local city government saw him on a TV documentary, they wasted no time in locking him up in a psychiatric hospital, for his own protection, no doubt.

Imagine if they started jailing lardies here in the US! Move over, the Bloods and the Crips - there's a new player in town, and you don't want him in the top bunk! The corrections department would have to modify their procedures; instead of using drug sniffing dogs at visiting time, they'd need burger sniffing dogs. No need to worry about an inmate's mother smuggling a gun into jail hidden in a cake - the only danger is the inmate will go into vapour lock when he scoffs it down in one!
Thanks to this, at least I know I can go to the UK and never worry about seeing my ex-wife! Lol.
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